• Understanding Autism from the Inside

    “Academics came easily to me. The rest of life—not so much.”
  • This post may contain affiliate links and we may earn compensation when you click on the links at no additional cost to you.

Aspie Teen Grieving the Loss of His Pet

Asperger's Teenager and Grief
Aspie Teen and “Buddy” soon after we took him home.
We will miss Buddy very much.

This is what Aspie Teen wrote on his Facebook page:


Dear Buddy,

I held on to you today and cried while you were leaving for last time I wish I could done something to save you I curse myself for not being able to save you. if only I caught you when I had the chance then you still be alive this very second. I miss you so so much that I cant bear it please have a nice life… in heaven with uncle angel. “

What Happened–

On Thursday evening my 13 and 8 year old sons was outside riding the dirt bikes they got for Christmas. Aspie Teen’s dog, Buddy, was securely on his lead outside. He slipped his collar and went running past my son.

Aspie Teen charged after him to try to catch him, but before he could catch up the dog darted into rush hour traffic and was struck by a car. Aspie Teen ran out after him almost getting hit himself. The cars did not and would not stop even for my son to get to his dog who now lied in the road.
A neighbor heard my son’s screams and ran out there to help him stop the traffic so he could get to the dog.  The wrapped the dog in a comforter while my 8-year-old ran to get me and my husband. We scooped him up, hopped in the van and rushed off to the animal hospital.
We were told that the dog was in a lot of pain, he was hurt too badly and would likely not even survive the night. They gave my son time alone with the dog to say good-bye. The entire place could hear the wails. We nearly had to drag my poor baby out of that place; he didn’t want to leave his dog.
The past two nights have been sleepless—filled with waking and his crying for his best friend. (As well as many comforting and stimming behaviors) We considered yesterday getting him another fur friend to help him through this time. He even wanted to go to the pound and look at the dogs, but it was too much for him so we came home. We will be waiting until he is ready for another friend.

A new pet for the younger ones:

My 8-year-old ASD child on the other hand was asking for a pup yesterday morning!  Instead, we allowed him to get a bunny rabbit. That has helped him.
Tantrum Tot got in the case with the bunny
Little Man (8) and Tantrum Tot (23 mo.) have spent the morning running after the rabbit while Aspie Teen is finally getting some sleep.
I feel terrible not being able to take my son’s pain away from him. Hearing him cry in his sleep is tearing my heart out.
Thank you all who visited my Facebook page, and sent him prayers and warm wishes.  He has read them all and although sad, he was happy to see that others cared about his pain as well. Please feel free to write him a little note in the comments section here; I know how much he will appreciate it.

Jeannie Davide-Rivera

Jeannie is an award-winning author, the Answers.com Autism Category Expert, contributes to Autism Parenting Magazine, and the Thinking Person's Guide to Autism. She lives in New York with her husband and four sons, on the autism spectrum.

5 Comments:

  1. I know that pain. Very well. My pets were very tasty to predators. Very sloppy predators. Losing a pet is bad enough. Burying the torn body of a pet is worse.

  2. I have lost pets too. Those that died sooner than of old age are the most difficult. I never quite lose the pain, but it does get easier. I cherish every dog who ever graced my life with theirs. I’ve loved each one deeply and grieved their loss the same. It is never easy to lose a friend.

  3. Oh, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Losing a pet is one of the hardest things our Aspie has had to deal with, the pain is so great and so consuming. I hope that in time he will find it in his heart to open up and share his love with another furbaby!

    • Thank you so much. We have the third night of waking to tears in a row. I wish I could just take the pain away. We now have two bunnies hopping around our kitchen, which has helped my 8 yr old A LOT! Aspie Teen, however, goes back and forth from wanting to play with the bunnies and hold them, to tears for his dog. It is going to take time I am sure.

Comments are closed

  • Autism Family Travels at Passportsandpushpins.com

    [instagram-feed]