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Mommy is Melting: Heat, Hormones, and Overload

The Heat and the Hormones

Yesterday just was not a good day. It began at 7 a.m. with a whiny, cranky, Tantrum Tot (2) waking me up by smacking me and saying “Bad, bad.” Don’t know what Mom did this morning, but whatever it was, it is bad! Maybe he just did not like that he woke and found me fast asleep in bed.

I ran the little man (9) to school about 7:30, and Tantrum Tot was already not a happy camper. I only have him enrolled in daycare/preschool three days per week.  I am happy to announce that daycare is going much better than it has previously. He is having better days, and is not a screaming mess during the evening hours when he comes home.  But, yesterday was an “off” day so the Tot was home all day.

He literally screamed from 7:30 a.m. until 11:30 without ceasing.  Screamed, pulled on me, would not eat, would not get dressed, and there was really no indication of what the problem was. Finally, he asked to “go go,” which means he wants to leave the house and he allowed me to dress him.

We went to my mother’s where the plan was for him to play a little while I came back home, got some work done, and possibly a little bit of peace and quiet.  By this time, I had already been reduced to rocking tears—twice.

Back to the heat and the hormones—it is hot here in South Carolina, and being now 6 months pregnant with the whole summer to go—it feels even hotter.  My issues with temperature regulation are more pronounced during pregnancy, which I think is only normal since pregnant woman without sensory integration and temperature regulation issues are miserable in the hot summer months.  The heat was beginning to really get to me, and the screaming and crying that the Tot was dishing out was not helping—preggo hormones added into the mix resulted in a very tearful day.

When we arrived at my mother’s the Tot refused to get out of the car—he wanted “park park.” I had Aspie Teen with me who only wanted to get home to cool off, shower, and relax after a screaming Tot morning and now was dragged along to the park.  Aspie Teen complained and moaned the entire time we were out, which was driving me crazy after the morning we had, and I was headed toward serious overload.

OVERLOAD AND MAMA MELTDOWN

Sitting in the park in the heat listening to Aspie Teen complain was getting to me.  The park excursion ended when the Tot was ready to go. He grabbed his knapsack and headed back to the car where Aspie Teen was standing looking miserable.  Before we were packed back into the car I must have screamed at him (Aspie Teen) ten times!

Back at Grandma’s the Tot decided he was now going to cooperate.  He got out of the car, waved bye to me, and rushed off into Grandma’s house. The problem here is that by the time I got home I was so overwhelmed and overloaded that it took me a few hours just to calm myself long enough to try to take a nap! All hope of work was out the window.

Finally about 2:00 pm I was calm enough to lay down and doze off.  It lasted about 45 minutes to which I woke because I felt like someone one was kicking me in a full bladder.  Oh, ya…someone was–

Ever have to wee and have to hold it to the point where you are in so much pain you feel like your bladder is going to explode? That is how I felt when I woke up from my way too short nap.

NAP DIDN’T HELP

I was still just as overloaded when I woke from my nap then before I went to bed.  Usually I can rely on a little re-boot at least but it didn’t happen.  Little man came home from school, and it was just about time to pick up the Tot from Grandma’s AND Aspie Teen was being a miserable hormonal teenager! Plus I had not eaten the entire day! Not a good combination.

By the time Hubby got home from work, I was a mess.  Aspie Teen complained about what we were having for dinner and I lost it.  Could not stop the tears, and had to retreat into my own corner in the living room for several more hours without talking to anyone.

By the time I went to bed, I could not calm myself enough to even read, which is how I usually decompress.  I could not stop the tears, and I couldn’t explain with words why I was crying AND I was out of melatonin so I could not fall asleep!

Feeling better today so far…but I have gotten far too little sleep (the Tot woke me at 6 a.m.), but at least he is at daycare and was not a cranky  monster this morning. Tomorrow begins our week long family vacation and I have to find a way to get my act together and relax before then. Vacations, although I love them, are a hugely stressful event!

Jeannie Davide-Rivera

Jeannie is an award-winning author, the Answers.com Autism Category Expert, contributes to Autism Parenting Magazine, and the Thinking Person's Guide to Autism. She lives in New York with her husband and four sons, on the autism spectrum.