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Angry Aspie! Little man’s school is making me violent

Yesterday morning went really well, for our house anyway. Daylight savings time had everyone’s schedule messed up and the Tot was up at 6:18, but at least he was happy with his sippy cup in my bed watching Dora.

When the baby woke a few minutes later, I knew it was time to drag myself out of bed and get everyone dressed. To my amazement, little man’s (9) lunch was made, the Tot, (2)and the baby (2 months) were both dressed, and Aspie Teen (14) was up helping load them all into the van by 7:25!  Awesome! Plenty of time to get the little man to school by 7:50, drop off the Tot, and get the baby to his well baby appointment by 930, right?

Things were going great, until I turned around and saw that the Tot’s pants were soaked. I guess those new Lightening Mcqueen pull-ups didn’t do such a great job.

I didn’t even run back to the house to change him. I only ran in to get him a clean pair of pants. I figured since he was already strapped into his car seat, I would change him at daycare…only about ten minutes until we get there.

I rushed to little man’s school, pulling up on what should have been the car line at 7:45, with five minutes to spare, but there was no one on the line. I thought I missed something. Maybe there was no school today, maybe I’m in the twilight zone. I  double checked the clock, just in case daylight savings time did me in again, wouldn’t be the first time, but no, it was 7:45.

I pulled over, got him out if the car and walked him into school. We were late. Apparently the car line was freakishly short, never happens, and everyone was gone already, including the crossing guards. Weird–I’d dropped him off at this time many many times before making him run into school so he was not late.  There had always been people outside the school.

Anyway, I walk in to find out we are late, and I checked the clock again because now I was confused. Apparently, this year, the school schedule changed and instead of the kids needing to be in school by 750, they need to be there by 740!! Well, I missed that memo, which resulted in too many tardies for us!

So the ridiculous reaction the school had to too many lates is that the child gets suspended for the next day, and I have to drag my butt to the principals office the following morning so he can return to school.

And..if that isn’t enough, every day he is late after this one will result in another suspension.

My day gets better! He is only allowed 10 days absent (i got a letter about this too), more than that and he is not promoted. Well after the trip to NYC for my father’s funeral, and today, because suspension days count towards these absences, we are up to 9! So one more time late, he gets left back? It’s only November! Should I just take him out if school and keep him home now? Is that what they would like me to do? This school, with their stupid silent lunches, silent school buses, where they wield the privilege of recess like a bunch if power hungry maniacs is driving me crazy and making me violent. I want to punch someone in the nose!

Let me add, he was sent home with text books yesterday to do schoolwork at home, but no written assignments telling me what to make him do!

These kids lose recess if they are missing any part of their homework, a signature, or, now, if they fail a test!  If he goes to school tomorrow without today’s schoolwork, and loses recess, I am going to lose it!!!

UPDATE:

As an added bonus, this morning my alarm didn’t go off (I shut it off yesterday because little man didn’t have to go to school and forgot), and we were late, again! Someone save me!!!

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Jeannie Davide-Rivera

Jeannie is an award-winning author, the Answers.com Autism Category Expert, contributes to Autism Parenting Magazine, and the Thinking Person's Guide to Autism. She lives in New York with her husband and four sons, on the autism spectrum.

9 Comments:

  1. As for Daylight Saving Time:

    I have Asperger’s syndrome, too, and I hate Daylight Saving Time.
    I literally reprogrammed a digital clock so that it would adjust *itself* for Daylight Saving Time. (Yes, this involves calculating dates and days of the week, and yes, it was a bit tricky to get right.) It sounds like you could use one of these, too.

    As for your kid’s school:

    That’s no school you’re describing; that’s a prison.

  2. i really hate your school.
    isnt it against some kind of law to prevent kids from having physical activity? i mean what with the health-motivated governments and whatnot… you would think that recess would almost be a required thing.

    i think you should figure out some kind of PTA – protest to see if there isnt something more parents can do about these stupid insane damaging regulations. either that or homeschool him. yeah, right, add more things to your plate, maybe IM the crazy one. sorry. 😛

    this is hateful. i hate hate hate it. im sure the schools arent like that where i live however, im glad i homeschool anyway. or, rather, will be homeschooling. i guess we can call what we’re doing now unschooling. 😛

  3. I so feel for you. It sounds really weird how that school is run… I’ve never heard anything like it. They make rules that you can’t follow and then they punish you so you can follow even less? It’s over my head.

    • It makes no sense to me at all! I guess they think that the punishment will magically make me always be on time? For me, it de-motivates me. Now I couldn’t care less what time we get there! (Terrible, I know.)

  4. Wow, I would take this up with the school board. Number 1) being out for a death in the family should not be counted in a regular absent child. Number 2) If you never got the memo about the time change (now check how that was delivered to parents: by email, a handout to the child, a handout to the parent) then also hit the school board with that. Next not hitting the teacher in real life although I do understand the wanting to do that, I have so been there myself. Number 3) Let them know that if he has homework it better be written down somewhere by the teacher on paper or the document in hand or binder set up for Homework to do, a separate place organized by you and the teacher. Then and only then will you allow your child to be included in the process of doing homework at recess. Then if they finish the homework and time is left to recess he should be allowed out for however long. You can arrange this with the powers that be. If not, strike another blow at the school board.

    • Hubby scheduled a meeting with the school to discuss the little man’s needs (a round table sort of thing) on the 25th, and I intent to address this madness as well!

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